When your life spins out of control: which happens often, even now: you tend to grapple situations and muscle the variables to fit the outcomes. Problem is, if you only change the environment without revamping your thinking, circumstances pop back in shape. Ergo, you're right back where you started. Create a serene symmetry between your cognition and your conditions. Fill your space with the people and things that clearly reflect your values. Stop bucking the system, and start flowing with the undulations of life.